A grumpy Dad post-Halloween rant.

by The Daddy on November 3, 2010

Note: This is out of order for this week’s theme of eating, but let’s just file it under “topical”.

So I had this long rant I was working on for the day after Halloween. It was about our first group of trick or treaters that almost ruined the night for me because they were so super greedy with the candy (several handfuls) that I had to tell them it was enough, then they came back two more times, hoping I wouldn’t recognize them, trying to get more candy.

In the end, the rest of the entire night’s worth of trick or treaters ended up being average, non greedy monster run of the mill civilized children. I was questioning when I became such an old man grinch, waving my cane around, demanding kids to get off my proverbial lawn. I was looking forward to being a cool adult and a cooler dad, like so many people must, and I feel like I’ve failed keeping my youth, even at the early age of 30. I realize I spend way too much concern and frustration getting ramped up with injustice in the world, on the pettiest of levels. I feel like I’m always attributing it to bigger issues, when often, it’s probably no big thing. On Halloween I contemplated the best way to try and teach other greedy kids what they were doing wrong in various creative ways.

One would be to come out to the greedy group of kids and say “so sorry, we’re out of candy, some greedy kids earlier took it all.” Or, go out to the group of four greedy kids with a bowl with three pieces of candy inside and watch and see what they did. I should have just given them the appropriate amount of candy I felt wasn’t too greedy- a few pieces each. I wanted to avoid this, because as a kid I vowed I wouldn’t be that stingy grumpy grown-up and I would let kids take as much as they wanted, on this one night of magic. How things change. How perspective changes. Now a group of overly greedy kids who aren’t in the true (in my mind) spirit of the holiday, or at best, abusing it a little too much, gives me a crummy feeling in my gut and I start judging the parents, the personal caliber of these kids’ integrity and fear for the time when they’re older, running around shooting people and robbing houses.

All of this is part of the larger rant I was working on, hoping to post right after if not on Halloween night. It never quite came together, and more importantly, forced me to look at pages of my own cynical scrutinous nature. Not sure that’s the person I want to be, even though I still have strong feelings about the injustice of some thinking they deserve more than others, unable to enjoy life equally and in general, becoming greedy sons of bitches when they get to be adults.

So I’m not going to talk about that.

No, the vast majority of the kids were decent kids, who actually put effort into their costumes, got some free candy and had a Happy Halloween. I can’t let a few bad apples spoil the goulash, no matter how hard I think I want to. Teach your kids kindness, the value of sharing, and to not be douchebags, that’s all I hope we can all do.

Happy Grumpy Halloween.

{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }

Portland Dad November 3, 2010 at 4:10 pm

My wife gets super annoyed at the high school kids coming around for candy. We were asking her when she turned 60, but it does get annoying.


The Daddy November 3, 2010 at 5:37 pm

That I can kind of understand, but if they’ve got a decent costume and aren’t greedy, I don’t mind. The kids that pissed me off were about ten.


Ben November 8, 2010 at 5:21 pm

I didn’t have any that were too greedy but a couple stepped on my pet peeve of showing up with no costume.

No costume. No candy. We had several try that. It’s a part of the deal. I’m not giving you free stuff if you don’t humiliate yourself at least a little bit.


Leave a Comment

Notify me of followup comments via e-mail. You can also subscribe without commenting.

Previous post:

Next post: